Judy's Notebook: Dialogue

Showing posts with label Dialogue. Show all posts

04 July 2010

Happy Birthday Old Man!

I was up at dawn laying out the presents - one propeller replica that is 7 feet tall, hand blown glass ice cubes, a laminated poster of the Beaufort scale, a fancy stopwatch 60 second sweep analog style, and this hand painted card.

Then I went back to bed. He got up, made coffee, and opened up the card. Shortly thereafter I woke up and he opened up the presents. The propeller he knew about because I wanted to get him one from Restoration Hardware. Pictured here. But ended up with something made of darker wood.

The stopwatch he sort of knew too, but I was like swimming in possibilities and finally told him - well it went down like this.

Me: "Now, what EXACTLY do you want?"
Him: "Not a digital. I want an old-fashioned stopwatch."
Me: "OK but here's the deal. There are these two stemmed, 30 second sweep, 15 min timers aplenty. Does that sound like what you want?"
Him: "Huh?"
Me: "You know, the tick tock goes around in 30 seconds."
Him: "What?"
Me: "You do know what a stopwatch is, right?"
Him: "My coach wore one ... like (the TV show) 60 minutes."
Me: "Oh."
Me: "So you want a 60 second sweep?"
Him: "Ummm."

One week later.
Me: "Dude, you're on your own with the stopwatch."
Him: "Okay."

But of course I kept on looking, and I found something too. Really sweet!

It is connected with Voice Over and that is something I've been wanting to try forever. So I bought the stopwatch and secretly, well not really, have been wanting to keep it for myself. But I didn't.

He's been timing everything too. More on that later.

17 May 2010

Now that you mention it ...

I showed these to The Mister and predictably he said, I can't eat that.

I said, sure you can.

No! It's on my list.

You eat lots of stuff "on your list."

But that's really high on my list.

One bite of salmon is not going to kill you. You know, there's a difference between being allergic and just not wanting to eat something.

I don't want to eat it and consider myself allergic. Besides they're ghoulish.

They're what?

Like Hallowe'en.

They're PANDAS!

28 April 2010

Golf: Part One

I have recently shown an affinity for golfing - online golfing that is. Having never hit a real golf ball except in miniature, I figured I would check out our local area, which sports at least three golf courses.

Here is the swanky one. A club.

I used to hate clubs, having grown up in that kind of elitist community. But now I don't care. Really.

I think do they have good food at the restaurant? Do they have a full bar?

I always order a cheese burger well-done as a marker for a new place. The one here rated a 2 and 1/2 stars out of five. He got the fish tacos and ate the whole plate. Maybe a cheeseburger is not a good marker.

But alas only beer and wine, and fake cocktails. So poo.

There was a lively convo with the owner and other guests on why she can't get a likker lissence. Oh the drama!

With all the golf carts, I figured everyone would need them, but I saw many many people walking with their bags out here on a lovely spring day.

Ahh!

Choo!

10 October 2009

October 10th

Just in:

Me: Hey! It's the 10th minute of the 10th hour of the 10th day of the 10th month.

Him: Too bad you didn't make it to the second.

Me: Hey! It was only the 9th minute.

Him: Well here's your chance.

Me: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3 It's now the 10th second of the 10th minute of the 10th hour of 10th day of the 10th month.

Him: Good for you.

Me: Wait until next year.

17 February 2009

I Survived Valentine's Day

Just barely.

It felt like it lasted 2 and 1/2 days, but I think we are finally over it and have moved on to everyday nattering.

It all started quite innocent. On a spur of moment, I bought him a little egg spatula. It was meant to be a funny gift. He likes eggs *a lot* so what the heck, I thought, a novelty gift. It kind of looks like him too. I wrapped it in teal tissue and tied a hot pink string around it. When I gave the present to him V-day morning, the first thing he said was Oh Shit!

I laughed. No Big Deal! I said, You'll see. Well, he wouldn't open it. After a bit of com'on, he did and said (and I quote), "I thought we weren't going to buy anymore cheap pieces of crap!"

What a sweetie, huh? Then he proceeded to throw away the handmade heart I adorned the package with. I said, You Threw Away My Heart?! So he dug it out of the trash and gave it back to me.

Now way back when I was in 8th grade English, I was the best student at interpreting the symbology of the lyrics to music. When the Miss Newman asked the class, What does "I am a Rock. I am an Island" mean, I knew the answer.

When my heart gets dug out of the trash and is given back to me, believe me, I know what that means.

Just the same. Because I knew he felt bad about not getting me anything, I sucked it up and offer to cook a special dinner. Sure he said. Like whatever.

He tells me we have to finish our shopping (and he hates to shop), so we go into town. I'm thinking this is all a plot. He's got to have something up his sleeve. He's going to surprise me! We go to the market (which was full of clueless shoppers armed with big metal carts), and I feel lucky to get out of there without a lot of bruising. So I tell him I won't be but a few minutes because I have to run over to the health food store for blah blah.

I'm thinking if I leave him alone, he'll grab some purple tulips that I love, and I know he knows that I love purple tulips.

So 10 minutes later, I find him reading the newspaper in the parking lot. Hey, I said, That took forever. He said, It always does. With a sneer. And off we go, driving towards home.

After a bit, I said, You didn't get me any flowers, did you?

And he said, Oh I never know if flowers are safe around the cat.

I just looked at him. He pulled the get-out-of-jail-free card, "Si's safety."

I said, You damn well know Si doesn't eat flowers. That was Clancey. That was 8 years ago.

Oh, he said, I can never remember.

And still I made him that pot pie.

19 December 2008

Small Bowl Fetish

We went back to our favorite restaurant today. After having one of the most horrible Thursdays in recent memory (pipes froze, water turns off while I'm in the shower, greasy hair all day, and that was just the beginning), I surely had a very fine Friday to make up for it.

First off, the Japanese kitty holds up his left paw to welcome customers. According to the front person, the kitty waves to you with paw facing front. Come, come in, customer with money.

We were seated and the waitstaff came right over as always. How are you today? Excellent, I replied. When Judy smiles, the whole world smiles.

I found out I really am the worst speller this side of the Mississippi. Sake is spelled with an e not i. And I admitted my mistake to him. And he gave me a scrunched up nose. He said Your public deserves better.

You hear that public! Gosh I laughed so hard I hope the other diners were not offended. They are public too. So many public. I'm glad I remembered the el.

We then ordered the exact same thing. This never happens because supposedly we share. However, we hardly ever share. I'm all Can I have a bite? and Get yer paws off my dish.

To spice up this fabulous meal. I ordered some sushi a la carte. Tuna. So good! And I tell him that I read the sushi chef always puts the right amount of wasabi just under the tuna on top of the rice. And Americans always make their dipping sauce with excess amounts of wasabi to prove they're tough.

I have to beg him to share the sushi with me.

The meal was beginning to be an epic dream. The waitstaff knew I needed water before I asked for it. She's telepathic I said. Christmas tip I said. It's my treat I said.

I ordered a seaweed salad to SHARE. The textures are incredible. Slippery. Slimy. So loud in my ear crunchy. Radish sprouts taste so good! (Must remember to sprout radish seeds at home for salads.) The last time we ordered this I was BALD! I said. Seaweed makes live a long time! I said. I want Miso soup for breakfast everyday! I said.

Each little bowl filled with a little something. I just love little footed bowls I said. His eyes slide to the side. Let's go to Tarjay after this I said. He says okay really really wishing I was kidding.